Project Virgle and Other Cheeky April Fools’ Jokes

Those people at Google are naughty, naughty, naughty. They are cheeky little monkeys, and if I did not derive so much pleasure from their April Fools’ collaborations, I should have to take them to task indeed.

For those who need another sensory element added to their book reading, try Google’s new scratch and sniff technology over at Google Books. Ever wanted to smell the Color Atlas of Dental Medicine: Periodentology? Now you can. [Hint: Keep hitting the Refresh button to continue to find wondrous new scratch and sniff offerings. And follow up, clicking the book and the scratch and sniff links]

For all of us time-challenged email addicts, fortunately, now we have Gmail Custom Time, an application that ensures we’ll never be late again:

Gmail Custom Time

Finally, the piece de resistance, Google has teamed up with British entrepreneur Richard Branson of Virgin to create the first human colony on Mars with Project Virgle. You can even apply to be a Virgle pioneer. The application includes pertinent multiple choice questions such as:

# 6. If I was unexpectedly confronted with the emergence of a bewilderingly alien and frighteningly advanced Martian life form which appeared bent on killing me if I failed to quickly and effectively communicate my peaceful intentions and potential value to its civilization, I would:

  • Die
  • Whip out my handy universal transcorder and start schmoozing my ass off.
  • Well, given that there’s no such thing as a transcorder that works for a Martian language that we haven’t even heard yet, I guess I’d just do my best to seem non-threatening while communicating my peaceful intentions with subtly universal hand gestures.
  • Run straight toward the Martian while screaming wildly and brandishing whatever weapon happens to be handy.

and:

# 9. A multi-stage heavy lift rocket built using established solid and liquid propellant technology with solid boosters doubled for increased payload capability could start a burn for insertion into a lunar trajectory and then back toward Earth for final insertion into a modified Hohmann Transfer Orbit, increasing its final Earth-to-Mars transfer velocity through a periapsis delta-v burn performed at the closest lunar and subsequent Earth approach, with the additional delta v gained on account of the potential energy from the mass of expended propellant,

  • Actually, I would think fairly quickly and easily
  • Only with significant time and fuel expenditure
  • My SAT tutor said to always guess C if you aren’t sure
  • goo goo ga ga hee hee ha ha

So there you have it. Help save humanity with Virgle.virgle-mars.jpg

Now, Google, get back to work! You have next April 1 to start planning for.

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7 Responses to “Project Virgle and Other Cheeky April Fools’ Jokes”

  1. Betty Olson Says:

    Outstanding! Since my spiritual name is “Gullibility”, I went right to the Project Virgle website……and took the test to determine my Pioneering potential….which was when I discovered that it was, perhaps, an April Fools spoof. I am profoundly disappointed.

  2. toddiedowns Says:

    Sorry about that. If you go to Wikipedia and search “Google Hoaxes,” it will give you the yearly rundown of their silliness. I look forward to seeing what they come up with every year.

  3. merlotmom Says:

    very funny post. i connected to you through the vital midlife discussion currently on blogher. i, too, am a chocoholic. only the good dark stuff though. i look forward to reading your blog as my interests are also varied like yours. nice to meet you!

  4. Sheepdisorder Says:

    April Fool’s Day is my favorite day of the year! Thanks for adding to the fun….

  5. toddiedowns Says:

    Back at ya! Feel free to post descriptions of some of the better April Fools’ stories you’ve heard this year. I have yet to find out what the NPR story was.

  6. The Midlife Gals Says:

    Dang, I wish I’d found byJane and your site a lot sooner. I spend so much time blogging that I miss reading great blogs like yours.

    Allow US to be one of the “blogs YOU like to read.” We are The Midlife Gals and we found you on byJane’s blogroll.

    Check us out and don’t forget to watch a few of our nutty videos which can all be accessed from the right side of our blog

    The Midlife Gals
    http://midlifegals.blogspot.com

    enjoy, and we love your site!

    KK and SalGal

  7. toddiedowns Says:

    Howdee! KK and SalGal – Just got back from checking out your blog, and consider us all in the same mutual admiration society. I can’t wait to check out your videos – what’s their rating, by the way?

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